Let's start at August 5th. Jamaica

 I'd hustled and busted my ass for this trip. Careful planning and truly working my ass off and if I have a lot of ass.  

So the first full day was just a nightmare. Dustin in his mental capacity was in his explosive victim, yada yada mode. One I don't miss.  I couldn't believe this was my day, my first day in Jamaica.  

By the evening Husband#2 is nearly or just over but damn spanky close to 15 beers. I can't even tell you the joy he is. 

After 2 beers, (or is nearly daily 1 large can) his mood can shift if he's triggered.  He can be excitable.

After 4 beers (his 2 large cans) he's no longer hungry, his level one above is heightened. Here is typically gets on a rant, usually about work, but it can be something I bring up, maybe my mom, my kids, my work, class, something, but he will circle a negative convo and beat it to death. He talks faster and a bit louder.

After several beers, about 6 to 10 he starts grumbling when he sits still, he whispers under his breath, he puts a can or bottle down and twirls it on the table like he's finding  a groove it would sit in. He talks LOUD, he is excitable on negativity.   At this point you just don't engage. AT ALL.

After 10 it's a level of almost hell, everything prior plus he's embarrassing and he's also a slice of I want to go go go, keep the party alive. He can't sit still, he is busy body but boy is he dragging negative nancy with him.

He's circling today with Dustins behavior, and he won't stop, he continues repeating and repeating how he's not going to do this. I leave him alone and than make the mistake of going back out to more nonsense

My first grandchild was born the day before.  So stupid me goes to the deck he is sitting on and he says to me "Why am I not in the group text" (grandchild born, immediate family) I said, it's just the immediate family. No big deal. He goes on and ON and ONNNN about how he's not in it, he should be, why do I have to ask for pics. I've been married to you over 2 years and I'm still not in it. I don't even have the boys phone numbers, none of them. I said to him, yes you do. He argued with me, "I do NOT", "I never have" he continues beating this dead horse as I stand there taking this bullshit in. Are you fucking kidding me I think to myself.  I try to reason. Why? I have no idea because I'm nearly a professional at dealing with this shit.  I say to him, let me see your contacts, they are there.  With that I found every fucking number of my kids. "Well, I don't remember that".  With that I go inside.

Not long after he comes in and says "I'm sorry" as is slurs off his tongue.  I said something proactive and defensive and in usual asshole sense he snaps. "I'm trying to say sorry".


This was my first day of vacation.  Yippee. He slept in the drunk loft.  I will never vacation with him again. 

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